Wednesday, May 25, 2011

So maybe I have a problem...


So somehow my original post about this was deleted. Damn blogger gnomes leave my crap alone. I may be pretty computer savvy but I am easily frustrated by technology issues and have been known to threaten inanimate objects when they don't cooperate with me.

Well onto the main topic here. So the picture above is majority of my own shoe collection. The boots wouldn't fit in the picture so they don't count. The collection has completely over run the shoe shelves and now takes up half of my floor in the closet. I have been told by many of my friends and family that I have a little bit of a problem. I have even been told by Little Man that I am shoe addicted. Psssh I roll my eyes at that statement!

Yes I have a ton of shoes and yes some days I wear flip flops instead of heels but the true magic behind the shoes is that the minute I start to feel down I can throw on a pair of shoes and instantly feel better. When I know I am going to have a difficult day I wear heels and it gives me the power boost I need. Heels automatically make you feel and look better. You stand straighter and your legs look a mile long. And trust me as someone who some view as tall, 5' 7 1/2" (the docs refuse to let me say 5' 8"), I have short legs.

Some people say that since I turn to shoes to "make me happy" that I definitely have a problem and I should have a healthier outlet to make myself feel better. To those people I have this to say, let me be. I am not doing anything illegal nor am I hindering my or my children's lives. Do I have to have shoes, no. Will I freak out if I don't have them, no. But I enjoy them.

I think that everyone has their vices and as long as they are healthy and legal no one should knock them down. Well it has been two long weeks since I have been able to wear anything but flip flops (new tattoo's on both feet) and today was the first day I was able to wear heels and I rocked them. Well time to jump in the bath, another thing that has been missing for a while, and then get an early night.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Pre Packaged Boyfriend...

ngSo I have been sitting on the blog post for a couple of days, life was busy so no time to sit down and write. Well on Friday I had to get out of the office for a little bit, the level of craziness was higher than Mt. Everest, so I decided to get some Chinese food for lunch. I know, what the hell was I thinking, I always feel like shit about two hours after eating the food until I can crap and then I feel fine again. But damn it was so yummy eating it.

So there I am in line at the food court when the server asks me what I want, well as anyone who has ate food court Chinese you have a ton of choices and you build your entrĂ©e. Yes I get that you can do that a bunch of places, but I was bored hungry and in line for food and thought about crap so I don’t care.

So as I get my fried rice, mango chicken, and beef with broccoli I realize that I like multiple flavors within the same meal. Maybe this is why my small dating history never worked out. I am always on one side of the spectrum; I guess I need a mix. I have multiple interests so the other half should too. I look at Ex1 and see that he was exactly what I wanted/needed when I was 17 but as I grew I matured on a completely different path then him. Where as I still enjoyed some of the same things I became infinitely more interested in the art world, a world where he wanted nothing to do with.

Then you have the recent Ex, Ex2. We had tons in common. I mean it got to the point where it was almost scary. You name it we had it in common. From life experiences to music selection, to what was our favorite 80’s movie. Well as things got more serious little things would pop up that should have ended it from the beginning but I chose to ignore. Yes I got him to go to the theatre and he was interested but on huge life decisions we differed. I am all for gay marriage he was not. I could never marry someone who I didn’t live with prior; he would never live with someone who he wasn’t married to. Well eventually things ended. Side Note: I am falling in love with you so I need to be single! This was his break up reasoning. Most contradictory statement I have ever heard.

So with my lessons in taste I would like to find the take out counter where I can step up and order me a tall spontaneous guy, with a side of artistic interest and good morals to go. Now I am not so stuck up as to think that men don’t deserve a chance to step up and order a girlfriend so if anyone would like to order a laid back chick, with a side of spunk and compassion (with a shot of crazy) well then hell order me up!!!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The one and only Oops

So how to start with describing Oops, this could turn into one of the longest posts but I am going to try and keep it relatively short. She is family and older than me so if I really felt like it I could sit here and write years worth of info but really who would want to read that. I get blogs are windows into our lives but its not like you want to sit there and read someones entire life biography. Hell I wouldn't even want to read that much about myself. Maybe if I was famous but sadly I am not, except in my own world where I am the shit!

Well first off like I previously posted she is family, cousin to be exact. She is Unc's second oldest and closest to my age out of his pack. My Mom is the second youngest and Unc is the youngest out of all those kids, so our families were always around each other. Plus we lived relatively close to each other, St. Paul and Woodbury to be exact. All the other Aunts and Uncles lived around an hour away or more. Then you add in the aspect that my Mom was a single Mom so my Unc helped in the father figure role, along with my Gpa. This all added in us being around each other a lot.

The turning point that made us become so close was when she was introduced to her older sister's(C1) fiance's (at the time) group of friends. This was also around the same time that she moved out of Unc's house and in with Gma. I should mention that growing up my Mom always lived at my Grandparents so that was where I was raised..

Well C1 and her fiance(SB) ended it, he flipped and hurt her, and his house became a party house. Looking back now, even with all the conflicts between C1 and us, we should of stopped hanging out there but we were young and dumb and had stupid boy crushes so needless to say we still did. She had a crush on one boy, hehehehe I will call him Midget Arms (MA), and I had a little crush on another, I'll call him AT so of course we stayed hanging around. Eventually we both ended up hooking up with the respective guys. She actually ended up in a four year relationship with MA, I just hooked up with AT for a couple of months. That sounds horrible but its the truth and whatever.

This lead to her living at that house for a little while, until things went downhill with SB. Eventually her and MA moved in together and she only lived about five minutes away. I then got pregnant at 17 and she was a huge support for me through then. After having my son I realized that I wanted to go back and get my high school diploma and found an alternative school and dragged her with me. This then lead to us being together every Saturday morning so we became even closer.

Two and a half years later I was pregnant with my first daughter and having problems with the kid's father (Ex1). She was the one who I turned to repeatedly and no matter how down I was she would always pick me up and get me to laugh. Eventually Ex1 and I worked through things and were fine. Ex1 and I went through alot of ups and downs, broke up three times got back together and eventually we decided to have another baby. Well as it is known I did indeed get pregnant and at almost six months he ended things again. Some pretty nasty stuff was said on his part that being pregnant and hormonal really got me down, but guess who was there as one of my biggest supporters, yep Oops.

The time between Ex1 breaking up with me and me moving myself and the kids out, was a total of four days. A really long four days but I had to get out of there without him knowing the day. Of course Oops, along with my Mom, Zbag, and Chedder were there to help me pack up the entire house and get out of there all in one day. About two weeks later I moved into my own place and have been there since. Being a single pregnant Mom was not a cake walk, eventually Ex1 tried to come back into the picture, and stupid me entertained the idea but it never evolved into anything. There is a ton of story there but he is an Ex for a reason and I have moved past and refuse to dwell on it.

I have had to have three c-sections so that leads to at minimum a three day hospital stay. Well can you say inconvenient! With Little Man in school, even though, he and PRP could of went to Gma's I wanted them to be able to stay at home. Well Oops stepped up and stayed with my kids while I was in the hospital. They got to sleep in their own beds, got to school on time, and she brought them out to all their activities and parks.

I want to say it was about a month after I got home from the hospital when she basically moved in with me. She became the nanny to my kids and my roommate. Well living together we started to get inside jokes, who's turn it was to change Rugrat, bathe the other kids, cook dinner, etc... So that is how she became my husband. One late night of sleep deprivation and homework and we married ourselves. Pretty sure we laughed the entire night. Just thinking back now to some of the reactions when we would jokingly say it and people wouldn't know how to respond.

So how did she become my Ex-husband, well her and Army Man had been together for a long time but were broken up through the end of my pregnancy. Needless to say they got back together and are now married. Since bigamy is frowned on her and I had to divorce, and no people we never were in fact married, it was always just a joke. That pretty much covers everything. She now literally lives a hop, skip, and a jump away. A whopping total of 2minutes. Army Man is deploying so I am sure there will be a ton of insane moments this summer since we tend to bring out the crazy in each other.

Until next time...

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

The nutjobs that are family and friends

Kind of came to the conclusion that I should describe some of the characters who I call family and friends. Its pretty obvious that I am a mother of three so I want to introduce you all to Little Man, who is almost 7, Punk Rock Princess (PRP (do not ever refer to as just Princess she will attack)), just about 4, and Rugrat, who is a whopping 7months.

Being a single mom I am with them everyday and boy the stories I have. Other than the times that Grandma(my mother) takes them over night I don't get a lot of time away. Not complaining at all though. To start it off there is Gma, my mother, who helps me so much its unbelievable, and Great Gma, my grandma, who even at almost 90 always wants to help and spend time with my kids.

I have two younger siblings, well they are second cousins but Gma takes care of them, they are Midget 1(13) and Midget 2(11). I have an older sister but could care less about her, I will call her C2. C1 is Oops's older sister. The person that can get most confusing to describe is Oops. This chick is my best friend but also my cousin however I refer to and think of her as my sister and she is my ex-husband. Not to mention she is Godmother to Little Man. I'll give details in another post. Along with Oops you have Army Man who is her hubby and now my brother and Uncle to all my munchkins. He is deploying shortly so for the first time ever I hope this summer flies by for both of them.

Then there is my other best friend, Tee. She has been with me through so much and is someone who always looks out for the best, also a little crazy. She is Godmother to my youngest Rugrat. There is the long distance bestie who I was uber close to in highschool then we lost touch, well I was a bi*ch and lost touch, Nessa. Godmother to PRP who now claims that she is the reason Nessa comes to visit. There is my Unc who I am close to and was one of my main Father figures growing up and is now Godfather to PRP. Unc is really Oops's dad. Then there are her two brothers, Zbag (Little Man's Godfather) and Chedder (Rugrats Godfather). These two I also consider my younger brothers and trust me when I say they act like it. Little douches! Then there is one of my oldest friends, known her since grade school, Tray. This chick and I have done multitude of idiotic things and I am sure we will still.

I think I covered the main people who sporadically could pop up. If more make appearances then I will have to add them then.

Getting peed on is all good.

One of the many fun aspects of Motherhood, you get peed on. I tell you its always great when you wake up in the morning to find you stink. My lovely middle child, my Punk Rock Princess, decided to crawl into bed with me last night. Normally I would wake her up and walk her back to her room but I was exhausted. These coming weeks are completely overbooked with stuff to do so I vaguely remember her coming in my room but pretty sure I just rolled over.

Well big mistake on my part. Yep Mama woke up and I was peed on. She very rarly has accidents but of course it has to happen with me. In hindsight its not too bad, I mean its gross but I have been puked on, peed on, and even pooped on. Its all part of being a parent and not much you can do about it. I think the very first time I was peed on was when little man was maybe two weeks old and that's almost 7 years ago. Man eye opening to see how long it has been. Thinking back to yesterday toilets and using them was an ongoing theme.

Had to finish up the invites for my Grandma's 90th birthday so Oops and I were out running errands printing invites, envelopes, and maps. Well our conversations make absolutely no sense to the outside world and should probably not be said in public but no one has to listen. Well there was a lot of talk about how many times each of us crap a day and how long we wait after we eat, this all came up because I had the genius idea of having food court Chinese food for lunch, in my defense the orange chicken was yummy, and I was feeling pretty crappy. Well after leaving Wally World and getting in the car I felt horrible and my quote of the day "My life is flashing before my eyes and all I see is toilets". It made sense at the time and hell I'll still own it now, even with her blasting me on facebook! Sitting back and thinking about it makes me realize that this is nothing compared to what normally is said between us.

Gotta run, work is calling my name and as much as I want to ignore it the screams are becoming ridiculous.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Here we go again...

So for some unknown reason I have decided to give blogging another go. Did this once before but I was going threw a break up and the crap started to get sappy and I just didn't want to dwell on it. I normally am an upbeat insane nut job so writing debbie downers was annoying to say the least. Not to add that my life in jam packed with stuff so its a good thing that I have learned to function off of little to no sleep and a not so secret caffeine addiction. Hell I would be the first one to sign up for a coffee IV even with my fear of needles. But then again half of coffees allure is the fact that it just tastes so damn good and getting it pumped directly into me would take that away. I will ponder on that for awhile and try to come up with a solution.

So a little background, I am a young cough25cough SINGLE mother to three little demons, I mean angels who make my world bright and provide much needed comedic relief. I have an obsession with shoes, heels to be exact. My closet has slowly become overrun and I may just have to take over the kids closets as well. Plus the best friend/cousin/sister(I'll explain that later) is about to start a job at my favorite shoe store AND we have the same size shoe, hello discount!!!! Absolutely love tattoos! I have wanted one since the teenage years, never got one then thankfully, but have finally bite the bullet and am hooked. Went from none to five in less than a month. All script in another language. Looking forward to 3weeks when I start my back piece, over half of the back but go big or go home.

I am from a family of wackos and have insane friends. We are all missing some screws but it makes for fun experiences and a ton of messed up conversations. Well thats all I have time for now, catch ya on the flip side!!!